USB makes Satan happy in the pants.
Welder Saldanha, lunatic leader and founder of a Brazilian religious cult called “Paz do Senhor Amado” (“Peace of the beloved Lord”) has banned the use of any and all USB devices among group members. Why? Because the USB logo looks like the devil’s trident and shows sympathy for the dark side.
“The symbol of that name (a name which he doesn’t even like to pronounce) is a trident, which is used to torture souls that go to hell. Use only a symbol of those shows that all users of that vile technology are actually worshipers of Satan.” – Welder Saldanha
So the man took measures to exchange all the USB connections of his followers for Bluetooth ones, because “blue was the color of the eyes of our savior Jesus Christ” – it’s called Bluetooth, dude.
Blatant religious stupidity aside, I wonder what I should be packing for my trip to hell. Any suggestions?
PS: “The symbol of that name (a name which he doesn’t even like to pronounce)” – “worshipers of Satan” – oh no he said it.
PPS: Don’t let the Pope hear this or he’s going to have to “purify” our devices. He’ll probably want to create the Christian equivalent of Kosher.
