The secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure instead of having pain and pleasure use you. If you do that, you’re in control of your life. If you don’t, life controls you.
- Anthony Robbins -

Each and everyone of us has full control over our lives. It all rests upon our own will, it is all in our own power.

There are no obstacles or difficulties that can stop us from doing what we want
to do, or fulfilling our dreams, but there are also no entitlemens. Live a good life, do good deeds, think positive and good things will happen to you – everyone can do that.

There are three behaviours that we use to control our lives:

• what we do
• what we think
• and what we feel

Sometimes we feel miserable as a result of these behaviours. But we always have some control over what we do. Accepting misery is a choice, and we choose much of our misery. Here are 4 reasons why we choose misery :

1. To keep angering under control
2. To get others to help us out

…absolute behavior control is imminent…. The critical point of behavior control, in effect, is sneaking up on mankind without his self-conscious realization that a crisis is at hand. Man will… never self-consciously know that it has happened. - Raymond Houghton, ASCD (curriculum arm of the NEA), 1970

There are only a few of us that haven’t taken a personality test. They can be found all over the place, in magazines, websites… Lots of people are taking them to check their compatibility with the loved one, or to see what are the chances that their relationship will last. The problem is that only a few of us realise what these tests really are.

They not only tell us how we are, they also tell us how to be…

The four reasons why personality tests are really bad for your mental health:

1. They are manipulative. Let’s have an example. In a sex personality test, if you answer the question “How important is sex in your life?” with the fourth option (picture), the answer will score poorly. And if the other answers would follow on the same note (normal, not sex addict), the whole test will have a very low score, with a poor conclusion (picture). After a conclusion like this, the person who has taken the test will subconsciously try to change in order to get better test results in the future.

Role models are a good thing to have, because they can inspire us to aim for goals and achieve ambitions which we think are beyond ourselves. That goal or ambition might be to gain a higher degree, to learn to be an airline pilot or even to become a world class DJ.

Most of us have role models whom we admire. The reasons why they are our role models can be different, but the admiration they inspire, what they represent to us, is what attracts us. They have a quality, attitude or ability, that we wish we had ourselves, and they inspire us to reach beyond ourselves. It’s good to have these dreams and ambitions and to have people who inspire you to go for it!

“An ounce of action is worth a ton of theory.” – Friedrich Engels

Who’s your role model? You know, this always starts at the kindergarten. The teachers ask little students who their role model is. Most of them say police officer, fire fighter, or some cartoon characters, mostly heroic people. When I was in kindergarten, I never answered for that question. I had nothing on my mind to answer. Who is my role model? I really don’t think I’ve had any role models until recently, so I questioned myself again and again and again, and I have waited for a real role model…

It never came…

“What’s the outside world like? It’s beautiful, sunny, full of light, air… sweet words, beautiful people… There’s everything outside. But this?… this is a boring place and I can’t take it anymore. I want to escape. But how?… I’ve been hitting the walls of my tiny room for a long time, but all for nothing… I am forced to stay here for a little longer. Three months, almost ninety days… And I’ve been planning to escape for such a long time… too bad that my plans are useless.”

Who do you think that is? A thief that broke into the National Bank? The prime-minister caught with it’s hands in the public money? Someone convicted for a murder?
The answer is no to all of the above questions. Those were my thoughts from back when I was in my mother’s belly. You know… I have a very good memory.
In high school, at the biology classes, I used to tell stories about how I felt in my mother’s belly.

I think that we all agree that whoever would say such things is both a liar and a fool. Nobody can have such “old” memories. And even if we could remember how it was back then, what memories would they be? I mean, how can a baby know what’s on the outside world? And what reasons would he have to think that it would be better for him if he was there instead of his mother’s belly? Yes, outside there’s sun, air, and there are sweet words… only that his organism isn’t ready for such an adventure. His time will come…

Many kids are fascinated by the grown-up universe.
When a kid starts smoking he believes that this way he’ll become more interesting in the eyes of his friends, and more attractive for the girls. It doesn’t matter that smoking destroys his body, it doesn’t matter that as the years pass he’ll regret that he started smoking; all that matters for him is that he is trendy and cool.
As the time passes he’ll realize that all his heroism was for nothing… The girls who were impressed proved to be the cheapest friends, and so his struggle was in vain. He will regret it, but time doesn’t come back.

There are lots of magazines and movies that are not recommended for minors. But they are constantly looking for them, and when they get their hands on them they devour them like cannibals. Why? Because they’re on a constant search for powerfull experiences.

I lived that fascination myself a few years back,